I

Happiness

Finally, that’s what I want.
Happiness on every face
Happiness in every soul

I cant take anyone’s pain
I cant bear conflicts
I cant stand watching feelings of hatred—I would like to do something—Any thing to wash out all those ill feelings and ugly situations…

Irony is that I stay in pain
I choose to be in pain
I cannot be myself if I try to flee away from my pain.
I HAVE to feel it to the maximum…Its the only way to deal with it. I cant escape. And if I escape, I’ll lose myself.
The whirl of emotions in my mind end in pain
The flood of feelings filling in my soul drain into pain
Every word I speak, Every deed I do… everything, everything and everything gifts me pain.
Pain is the destination of every feeling, every thought and every action of mine.
Pain IS the destiny of my existence.

I can’t take the pain of ANYone around me…Leave alone the pain, I just cant bear any inconvenience to anyone… I’ll go great lengths to avoid it; But when it comes to mine, It’s something I dwell with. I can’t stay fine trying to escape it. Its my constant companion–a faithful companion rather. Its stays with me always.
I cry and cry and cry always. I’m fine with it. Very fine with it. Never fine without it.

I read that crying is foolish.
I hear that weeping is a sign of weakness and cowardice.
Imyself preach that nothing is strong enough to cause pain.

But still it is what I live with.
For me it’s not foolishness, Its wisdom– It clears my brain, makes me fit to think and act.
For me it’s not weakness, Its strength–Its makes me tackle anything ahead.
For me its not cowardice, Its courage– It makes me face everything head on.

I cant live without it. And I cant bear anyone else in pain!!

I want to gift everyone around me a smile. I’ll do anything for it–a smile on their face. Whatever it may cost me, it’s worth doing.
According to me, Its the only thing worth doing.
When it comes to me, I cry cry and cry…and let the pain stay with me all along and all alone.

This is how I live.

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